Friday, February 23, 2024

The Tea Spilleth Over

This break in the rain has residents out and about. Not only did I today run into Next Door Neighbor, Oversexed and the resident who married the man her mother used to be caretaker to, but also Talker and, at long last, Meat Man himself.

The morning started with my heading out for this morning’s workout, only to get trapped on the landing by a baby lizard on the stairs.

Stomping didn’t make it skedaddle so, putting my gear down, I went back into the unit, retrieved the patio broom from the outside storage area to sweep the creature away. Only, when I returned, it was gone.

Or so I thought because, after picking up my gear, heading for the stairs again, I spotted it — no longer on the stairs, but on the wall by the stairs.

The lizard was about to make me late for the Pain Cave, so I psyched myself up that I could do this. I could get down the stairs by walking sideways, away from the wall.

I gave it a go.

Midway the lizard tried to give me a heart attack by moving. It skedaddled from the wall to underneath a stair.

Arriving at the Pain Cave, I saw a resident in the lot that’s been keeping a low profile ever since she married the man she’d passed off as someone her mother used to be caretaker for and who she took over as caretaker when her mom passed away.

I’d bought it, but then she got religion, married the guy because she felt guilty about "living in sin" having passed the relationship off as caretaker.

I didn’t see the necessity to have lied about the relationship all those years, but whatever.

She tells me they’re in the process of moving to a "Mobile Home Park".

That translates to me as "Trailer Park".

She says she knows people there, so I wish them well.

Is that where everyone's been going that's moving out? Is that less expensive?

As for why she’s moving … her husband can no longer handle stairs, she needs a downstairs unit, but has been unable to get one here.

After working out and a stop by the grocery store, I returned to the complex and armed myself with that stylish walking stick from the car — the one I’d purchased for protection February of last year that has a sharp tool on the tip, just in case the lizard, or one of its relatives, was on the stairs or near my door.

Not to kill lizards, but to knock then off the stairs.

Fortunately, for both the creatures and myself, the stairs were clear; but I’ll be carrying that stick with me from now on … just in case.

Walking from the car to the stairs with gear and some of the groceries, I passed Next Door Neighbor and Oversexed — the resident that produced that naughty cupcake a while back and whose conversation seems to always turn to that three-letter word. The two were deep in spilling the tea about someone.

I just said "hey" and kept going.

I had to go back for the remaining groceries and, as I was crossing the parking lot, here comes Meat Man driving out of the complex.

He pulled up alongside, blew me a kiss and wished me a Happy New Year, because we’d not seen each other since Christmas.

Asking where he’d been all these many months, he said he’s been going back and forth taking care of his mom, who I know has one of those nice homes over near the College Campus ……… "She’s 86 now and needs help".

If he only knew …… having failed at making a pass at me some time ago, that he’d been coming on to a woman only six years younger than his mom.

So, anyway, after we did some catching up and he moved on, Oversexed said something to Next Door Neighbor, pointed in Meat Man’s direction and Next-Door Neighbor’s mouth flew open and, had she been wearing pearls, she would have clutched them.

"You two gossiping about H?" asked I.

Both doubled over in laughter, then Oversexed began spilling all of Meat Man’s tea.

Asking Oversexed if he’d made a play for her, her reply was "Who hasn’t he made a play for" and began naming names, like the Voice.

The Voice was the resident once mentioned in the blog because of her beautiful singing voice; also, because she was one of three millionaires living on the complex.

She’d come from a well-heeled prominent family; plus had a boyfriend who passed away, leaving her a Cadillac and his fortune.

She'd sold the Cadillac, pocketed that cash and, when the Voice unexpectedly passed away overnight in October ‘21, she was waiting for her portion of a $7 million inheritance that was in probate.

Oversexed said she’d see Meat Man, going in and out of the Voice’s unit. Hed go in at night, wouldn’t come out until the next morning.

Simultaneously, he had ……… and still has a well-off fiancé. The fiancé wants to get married, but he says he doesn't want to marry her, because she’s "too bossy".

I asked if the fiancé knows he’s a player, but Oversexed didn’t know the answer to that.

She also named the resident who lives across the quad, next door to Upstairs Lady — let’s call her The Fool because Oversexed says that resident is "So in love with him that she’s always cooking and taking meals to him".

Meat Man is rewarding Fool’s devotion by telling Oversexed to "Stay away from her. She’s crazy".

More like he doesn’t want Oversexed to tell Fool about the fiancé, and all his other dalliances on the complex.

Fool is also the resident Meat Man himself once disparaged to me ……… we’d actually gotten into it because he was on his high horse, deacon of the church persona, opining how others should live, and I wasn't having it.

It was the day he shot his shot, came onto me with, "I’m looking for a good woman" line. Since I wasn’t interested in being that woman, I deflected by pointing out other single women he might consider. Little did I know back then that he was already hooked up with several, but I’d suggested Next Door Neighbor and the one I’ve dubbed Fool.

He’d given me an unequivocal NO! to Next Door Neighbor, with whom he’d had dinner twice, and went off on a tirade about Fool cooking and sharing those dinners with an old army vet living here with an invalid wife.

My position was they could just be friends. His position was "HE’S MARRIED. WHAT THEY’RE DOING IS WRONG!".

Knowing what I know now, perhaps the old hypocrite was jealous.

The old vet moved out when the wife died, so now Fool is in love with and cooking for Meat Man.

He doesn’t seem to have a problem, finds nothing wrong with stringing Fool along, while having a fiancé, and trying to add others to his stable.

Oversexed didn’t seem to know about Meat Man failing with Homegirl, but she did say he recently was turned down by a new resident I’m not familiar with. The woman was said to have told him no, that she was happily married.

After being so judgmental about the old vet, did Meat Man know this new resident was married? I don’t know.

Oversexed went on to say the woman’s husband is a "Fine young brother with dreadlocks".

I don’t know how Meat Man, if he did know she was married, thought he could compete with a young man, and one so good looking as to be referred to as "fine", but being a dog, I guess Meat Man has to chase.

It seems Meat Man is oblivious to the fact his doggish behavior is being talked about, or he just doesn’t care.

Oversexed is evidently a confident of Meat Man — birds of a feather, water seeks its own level kind of thing I’m guessing. She knows all the tea, goes to the same church as he, where she says all the woman have crushes on him because he presents so well. If they only knew he’s the devil in disguise.

At any rate, Meat Man’s body count around here — successes and failures are piling up.

Oversexed ended the conversation with "Oh, and he’s waiting for his mother to die so he can move into her house".

While all this tea was being poured, TinTin had come out of her unit, whereupon Oversexed said to her, "I’ll be over in a minute".

TinTin replied, "Just knock on the door when you’re done".


I don’t know if old friends or new friends, but water seeking its own level again.

Heading back to my unit, I ran into Talker who asked about the stick.

After telling her it was to protect myself from lizards on the stairs, she said she’s not afraid of them, to call her next time and she’ll remove it.

If my stick can’t handle it, you can bet I’ll call her.


  1. I find lizards cute. But when we lived in San Diego, I would have worn riot gear to protect me from tarantulas!

    1. Would you believe ... two tarantulas have been spotted on the property and captured. One on the patio of the building next door. So glad I live upstairs, where there's few instances of creatures (insects and humans) coming near my space.

  2. Your complex has some interesting characters....more so than mine. The only two guys I know in mine who date have a firm rule about not dating where they live. Or as one of them more colorfully puts it, "You don't crap in the plate you eat off."

    1. Words to live by, and yesterday's tea is the result of some not heeding those words.

  3. You're lucky the nice little Gecko didn't hop into your bag when you set it down. They are friendly, climb everything and eat the little bugs you don't like. They don't bite, they just run off. They are very friendly in Hawaii, and can be shooed out the door if found inside. If you find one on a wall, put a glass over it, slide the glass on the wall toward the door and scoot them out. One Hawaii friend had a visiting Gecko that would sleep on top of a picture frame inside their house. He'd roll over for belly rubs. See, much nicer than the obnoxious neighbors. Linda in Kansas

    1. I agree that lizards are probably nicer than the human snakes we have around here. I'll keep my distance from both. Use that stick if I have to.

  4. Whew! You don't even need TV for entertainment with all that going on around you! Haha!

    1. Ain't that the truth. That was more tea than I can handle coming at me all at once.