Thursday, November 18, 2021

Too Late to Back Out Now

I’m not feeling good about next week’s Thanksgiving trip to meet the in-laws.

I didn’t have to worry so much last year about not showing up, when granddaughter said she and her new hubby were hosting a small event at their new home, because I had the excuse of the pandemic.

That Thanksgiving was eventually cancelled. The two decided against a get-together so soon into the Pandemic — when there was just masks for protection, no vaccine.

Since that time, granddaughter and her hubby — discovering they’d bought into a racist neighborhood, sold that house, purchased another and now are expecting their first child.

Again hosting at their new new home, granddaughter called to ask why I’d declined when her mom (Twin 1) asked if I was coming this year. Was it because the grandsons are not vaccinated?

Mostly yes, but actually, it was — like last year, a viable excuse for not showing up, but I said "Yes", that was the reason.

Granddaughter and her hubby made the decision it was important for me to be there, also to protect themselves, their unborn son, other guests, so they uninvited my unvaxxed grandsons. “Will you come now?”

What could I say but “okay”.

Since then, I’ve had a sense of doom and dread. Visions of my walking in, not liking what I see, turning around, getting back in the car and driving away.

My gut is acting up. I’ve been sick for no reason because I’ve been eating correct. In addition to which, I’ve been in pain, walking lopsided due to purchasing a new pillow that caused me to awaken the first morning having used it, to neck, shoulder and lower back pain.

My entire right side is frozen, hurts and no amount of Epson salt baths, pain ointments, workouts, has pulled my right side back into alignment, so I’m sort of walking lopsided, slanted, favoring the left side of my body.

It’s like the plan to attend Thanksgiving with granddaughter, her husband, see their home, meet the in-laws, has released the Plagues of Egypt upon me.

In the midst of this, granddaughter let me know that the youngest grandson will be in attendance because he IS vaccinated.

He’s not arrogant like his brothers, and I feel comfortable he’s not giving her the Aaron Rodgers spiel, because he works in a hospital, is constantly tested and wouldn’t have a job if he were not vaccinated. BUT … will his brothers use his attendance as an excuse to show up yet and still? Will granddaughter’s sensitive too sweet and caring nature cause her to go back to making excuses for her other brothers? Allow them to show up, if not inside, outside, somewhere nearby?

Maybe that’s why I’m getting visions of turning around, driving away.

And this morning, realizing how I’m not looking forward to the trip, but have already booked a hotel for myself and Twin 2, can’t back out without granddaughter being hurt, disappointed, which would anger her very protective husband, I thought to give myself something to do Thanksgiving morning that would make me look forward, pull me out of the Plagues of Egypt stage— register for the local Turkey Trot.

Would you believe, my registration would not go through. The process jammed at the payment stage.

Nothing is going right.

At any rate, after missing the wedding, no Thanksgiving last year, having not met the in-laws, this is something I need to do, must do, so I’m pushing through all that’s being thrown my way.

After all, sometimes the biggest blessing has come through my pushing through what I personally want to do and appearances that make it hard for me to get through. So, I’m doing this and we shall see.

16 comments:

  1. Sounds like an ok plan to go! Take plenty of masks. Take some paper ones too. If you meet an unvaxed person, offer them a paper mask instead of hugging them! Because you care about yourself and others. Find your own corner in the living room to keep as your own. You just gotta see those kids! Linda in Kansas

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    1. I'm a hugger, but stopped hugging people some time ago. When someone comes at me to give me a hug, I straight arm them to stop and offer an elbow instead. That's a good idea about isolating myself in a corner. I generally do anyway. LOL.

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  2. Thanksgiving is the one holiday I look forward to more then any other every year. But there is only ever 5 to 8 of us so not to many and we're all sane and vaccinated.

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    1. I didn't mind Thanksgiving so much as a child but, as an adult, it's been my least favorite holiday. Maybe because I'm not a good cook but, as the patriarch, I'm in the position of being expected to at least attend. Oh well. Things I do for my family.

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  3. "discovering they’d bought into a racist neighborhood"
    That must have been a bummer. Did they lose money when they sold? I don't know what I'd do if that happened to me. A Biden sign in the yard could get the house burned down.

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    1. I'm told it wasn't fun. The proud boys would harass granddaughter when she was outside, and security would follow her at the local drugstore. They paid an obscene amount of money for the house and sold it for $200,000 over that obscene amount. They're much happier in the new house and made out financially like a bandit, so all's good.

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  4. Your plagues of Egypt could very well be the result of stressing over Thanksgiving. I'm sure you're not alone. But yes, it's often good to get out of our comfort zones. I hope it all goes smoothly for you!

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    1. Probably, because I am stressing out, need to just relax, go with the flow.

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  5. I saw your Daughter on TV!!! And I'm excited and telling the Family, I know that Gal's Mother, she's a Blog Friend! *LOL* She's a very attractive Woman like her Mama. As for the Invite, it is stressful to meet new 'extended Family', because unlike just meeting random people, once they're Related, if it doesn't go well, it's a lot more skin in the Game, isn't it? *Le Sigh* The Young Prince's Partner told me I will never meet his Parents because he wouldn't put us thru that... he is estranged from them and has been for Years, so at least I don't have to worry about meeting a judgmental crew from Rural West Texas... whew! *Bwahahahaha* Congrats that the Granddaughter and Hubby are expecting their first Child and clearly they've had a Gender reveal... and I do Hope they protect themselves, you and their unborn Son and other Guests from any unvaxxed Family showing up? I wasn't exactly well received by The Man's Family, I'm not of their Faith and when they heard the Names of the Children he was inheriting when he married me they asked what 'Nationality' we were... well, that was a loaded question! *Bwahahahaha* Glad your Granddaughter and her Hubby Sold the Home in the Racist Neighborhood, it was something we endured in affluent Subdivision Hell and I felt so badly that The G-Kid Force had to endure the overt Racism and Homophobia there... the Fundies were the worst, extreme Religions are such zealots they tend to be the most Hateful Human I've ever encountered and have so much self-righteous bias and judgment that I don't consider they are following the same God/Jesus I'm familiar with... they just have a form and fashion of a whack Religion and self-righteousness is never Pretty. Glad to be gone from that Hellhole of a piss poor Community and I'm sure your Granddaughter is too, no place to raise their Child.

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    1. Fortunately, the husband's side of the family is cool, not uptight about skin color, other people's lifestyles and, I believe, have some mixed race couples, same sex couples in the family. So, I expect it will go well, even though a part of me is dreading going.

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  6. Our Thanksgiving is small, and vaxxed OR ELSE!!!
    Hopefully pushing through ill result in a nice day, or at the very least, a quick day!

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  7. This year it's just me and my daughter for Thanksgiving. I miss when my parents and their spouses, my brother and his wife, my nieces and nephews and Ken were all here. But everyone has either moved out of state, or passed away. So enjoy being able to get together with family for a short time. I'm sure the memories will be nice, not only for you but for your family.

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    1. I should at least get some good photos for the Creative Memories scrapbook.

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  8. I have reached the I want to stay home stage. Things are changing around here as to Thanksgiving plans so I am just waiting to see. I am not going if I don't want. I owe it to myself.

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    1. I hear ya. It's so much easier to stay home. But I worked through my resistance and am now looking forward to the get together.

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