Friday, October 3, 2025

Overthinking or Gut Instinct?

The Usual Suspects are nicer/kinder than myself, do not want to put a lock on the refrigerator. Instead, Crafty Lady asked me to make signs — one for the refrigerator, which she herself cleaned on Wednesday …


One for the microwave, which she also cleaned on Wednesday …


Mention of the cameras may be all it takes, but we’ll see.

When Crafty Lady first texted, asking me to make the signs, she offered to donate for paper and ink. I declined saying not necessary, that flyers and such are my way of supporting the community.

She was to have picked up the signs yesterday, on her way to 2:00 bible study in the Community Room …… there’s a group of residents that meet every Thursday to study scripture, led by the Bible Thumper that so got on my nerves a few years back.

When she didn’t show, and I later saw her on the walkway headed to her unit, I figured she’d forgotten.

Sure enough, a little while later she texted she’d forgotten, asked if I would be home today.

I’d replied no, that I had to make a run to Sprouts, but would drop the signs off at bingo (which I figured would be in progress by the time I returned).

She then texted, "Do you go to Sprouts often?"

"Oh, oh" thought I. Sensing she might want to tag along next time and me being a person that doesn't care for tagalongs, I answered without answering, said that Sprouts is the only store that offers products my sensitive stomach can tolerate.

She then texted that she’d been trying to find alfalfa sprouts, could she give me cash to buy for her.

I said sure, no problem, I’d purchase, let her know the cost after.

I was impressed with the Halloween display at Sprouts.



Wish I’d thought of adding a garland of fall leaves to my patio display — intertwined in the railings.

Returning to the complex, I popped into bingo, gave Crafty Lady the signs/alfalfa sprouts, told her to pay it forward (because, inasmuch as she gives us craft supplies no charge, not charging for the alfalfa is the right thing to do).

Instead of saying thank you, she said "Give me a hug", stood up, spread out her arms, wrapped her arms around me, pulled me in for a hug that lasted a little too long.

I found it unnecessary, really weird and strangely uncomfortable.

I feel Crafty Lady is trying to get too close and familiar with me at a level I would not like.

I question her reason for doing so.

Not only did she early on send me a Facebook friend request, which I declined, she always greets me in text and in person with "Hey, beautiful".

I don’t know folks. You can probably guess by now what my gut is telling me, while my head is saying no, you’re overthinking it because she has children, grandchildren, but I’m not so naïve as to not know that doesn’t mean what my gut is telling me can’t still be so.

I’ll still attend Crafts on Monday, hope what I’m sensing and what my gut is telling me is simply overthinking, and if it's not overthinking, that she has the good sense to pick up, understand and respect that I’m strictly dickly before she crosses the line.

35 comments:

  1. I'm not a hugger. People can be just huggers. But it makes me uncomfortable.

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    1. That's the first time a hug made me feel uncomfortable, felt creepy.

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  2. Hey Beautiful! LOL! Who knows the intentions. Believe me, having kids and grandkids means zip. I've got stories! Oh boy! We won't go there right now but you can probably do the math. Anyway, if that would happen next time I'd just say...oh not now...I'm just getting over a .....fill in the blanks. That was kind of you to pay it forward with the sprouts. Good luck with those signs. 'Camera's watching' might do the trick.
    Paranormal John

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    1. Yes, I think mention of the camera might help, except only management has access to the recordings and I can't see them helping us if someone ignores the notes, runs off with things that aren't theirs. I'm going to proceed with caution around Crafty Lady and, if I ever deliver something to her again, I'll leave it steps away, out of hugging range.

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  3. I'm not a hugger either but one of my new neighbors is and she hugs me and the Prom Queen. I laughed with my kids about it because they know I am not a hugger except for small grandchildren. Maybe she is just a hugger and really thankful for your help.

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    1. I don't sense she's a thankful hugger. She's giving me the creeps.

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  4. I know this may sound mean and all, but when someone I know a little bit says, "Can I give you a hug?" I say, "Not my thing, but thanks."
    I hug people I love as a rule.

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    1. Doesn't sound mean to me at all, and I wish I'd have not let her hug me. There won't be a second time.

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  5. Crafty Lady may have a Girl Crush on ya Shirley? *Winks* I'm a Hugger but I respect when folks are not and it's important to know how long is too long to give one. She MAY just be a Hugger, but if your Gut is feeling uneasy about the contact, I'd go with your instincts. I think the Signs are appropriate to hopefully keep the Fridge and Microwave not only Clean, but that people aren't violating what other people are putting in there by taking what isn't theirs. I remember once at the DA's Office one of the Prosecutors was drinking a Soda from the Employee Fridge that had a big bold Female's Name on it in Black Magic Marker... I brought it to his attention, since taking other Co-Workers food and drinks is just crass... especially if you're a Prosecuting Attorney, which, was rather Ironic, huh?

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    1. The more I think about how uncomfortable that hug made me, the angrier I get. I don't want to believe what my gut is telling me, but it's not led me wrong yet, so I'm listening to it. When I was in the workforce, I saw how upset others got when lunchtime came and someone had taken their lunch. I didn't blame them for being upset and, had it been me, I'd have set up a booby trap lunch ... ingredients that would have sent them to the potty for days.

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    2. I still can't get into your page. Blogger acting up again. I'm going to try accessing your blog on my phone.

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    3. Hope the Computer Issues with Blogger resolve? I've recently had some temporary glitches with loading my Photos onto a Post. I have to back out and close out, go back in, then it works fine. Scares me coz you know sometimes they 'enhance' something and then we have to relearn everything and I'm so Tech Challenged that it panics me.

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    4. Nope, still can't get in. Tried my phone, but same blocked message. Whatever it is will eventually clear up. Blogger be that way sometimes, but I wonder if I'm the only one being denied access.

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  6. The signs! All I can hear is Leslie Jones reading the sign-
    "Please note. The fridge is clean and for event use ONLY, please DO NOT REMOVE items that are NOT yours. The cameras are watching. And IF you goofy mother f@*#*@s do it, I will KICK your ASS!

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    1. I added the please, lol. She just wanted to go hardline with those warning words.

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  7. Hahahahaha, "strictly dickly" -- haven't heard that expression before!

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  8. Let's see: you typically overthink anyway, but it's jolly. Love the "strictly dickly" definition. On my rounds as a nurse into nursing homes and dealing with older folks, SO many of them are just lonely and glad someone is paying attention to them. Some are huggy, some are rude and mean. Probably not gay as much as leader of the lonlies wanting to provide some good vibe jollies to the neighborhood. Hope she doesn't end up giving you her entire grocery list. Just let her know you're not a hugger person and saying "hi" is jolly for you, and that you're actually a very private person. Linda in Kansas

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    1. A retired Deputy Sheriff, she's got her hands in a lot of pies around here, so I don't see her as lonely. Plus, she has a lot of friends from the look of her FB page, plus her grandsons visit often. I'm going to avoid further shopping and hugging.

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  9. Some people are just huggers. But if you don’t want to hug, especially not for a prolonged period of time, you shouldn’t have to. That is so awkward.

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    1. It was awkward and embarrassing as the bingo room was crowded with residents. It was almost like she was showing off that we're close, which we are not.

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  10. I'm not someone who likes to be hugged, especially now in flu season and with covid being year-around now and not having a season. Nothing wrong with telling people who try to come in for a hug that you'd rather not. I do it and blame it one being a "bit of a germaphopic." Saying "cameras are watching" assumes you are thinking of the hug in a sexual way and what if that is not her intent at all---then you've labeled yourself.

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    1. I've hugged and been hugged by women before, so I know the difference. This hug felt sexual. I didn't like it.

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  11. To my suspicious mind, even the request for sprouts sounds like an ulterior motive.

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  12. It's great that you and your fellow tenants got the clubhouse fridge and microwave back -- your "tea recons" should bear lots of fruit from now on, LOL! And I'm surprised that a retired Deputy Sheriff doesn't know that unwanted touching is a crime in most jurisdictions. Perhaps she needs to be reminded of that if the "I'm not a hugger" doesn't work.

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    1. Good point about unwanted touching being a crime. Maybe I should wear a sign ... look but don't touch.

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    2. Or one that says "Jail Bait", LOL!

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  13. Hopefully the uncomfortable hug wasn't something bad. Hopefully she doesn't try to take advantage of your generosity and send you a long grocery list of things to look out for her.

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    1. I can see it coming that, instead of a list, she asks to tagalong next time. Not gonna happen and, if it offends her when I say I'd rather not, so be it.

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  14. LOL! Love the "strictly dickly" phrase!

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    1. Two words that says it all without further explanation.

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