Wednesday, May 19, 2021

Life is Too Short for Inconsistent Friends

In chatting with the Baker yesterday, as to whether or not either of us trusts this management group enough to get involved with management’s latest foray into so called “improving our current living situation” ─ installing backup batteries to offset upcoming power outages, conversation turned to Apache.

He and the Baker talk on the phone every single day.

I don’t even talk to family members every single day so, though I miss my buddy Apache, I’m glad he can’t call me every day and I’m afraid to call and check on him.

He has one of those government-issued phones, which he has misplaced on at least three/four occasions, i.e., lost and one time stolen from the Community Room, whereupon strange things began happening with my phone.

I’m assuming that whoever had Apache’s phone(s) was selling off his address book, resulting in my getting telephone calls and messages from all over the country, plus my number being used to spoof others.

I once had a woman return a call from me. When I said I didn’t know her, had not called her, she argued me down that the only way my number would be on her call log is that I did indeed call her.

At any rate, it ended up with my having to block Apache’s number, along with blocking calls/messages from those not on my contact list. If I wanted to talk to Apache, or he to me, we’d knock on each other’s door.

Now that we can no longer do that, I suggested to the Baker that we get together with Apache and do something.

She said she’d been thinking the same thing and had been discussing it with the Seer.

THE SEER!? Since when did she begin giving a tinker’s damn about Apache?

After hooking up with Shadow, the Seer went to the dark side ─ became negative, always upset, always complaining about someone, always in a mood, what my mother termed as “sometimey” ─ sometimes she’d speak, sometimes she’d turn up her nose and ignore you, sometimes she’d cut her eyes and give you the mad dog treatment. Apache got the worst of it, because the Seer began badmouthing him, making trouble between he and Shadow.

The Baker and Apache rolled with it. I did too ... for a while because I didn’t know where this not talking to me, not returning my friendly waves was coming from. We’d all been such good friends for such a long time that we, though puzzled, ignored the behavior and let her get away with her sometimey ways.

The Baker and Apache are the too nice too forgiving types. The Baker kept up the friendship as best she could, Apache did the same. When the Seer called him one night to remove a homeless man sleeping on her doorstep ─ in spite of all the hurt she'd brought upon him, he'd actually responded.

I on the other hand have a limit line. After giving the Seer multiple opportunities to straighten up and fly right, when she yet again ignored a greeting of mine (June of last year) was when I moved her to the deleted file.

If and when I see her on the property, I don’t wave unless she waves, I don’t speak unless she speaks.

Thus far she hasn't, so I don't ... and at this point, probably won't even if she does, because once deleted you're gone.

Consequently, I'll have no problem declining a group get-together with Apache that includes the Seer ─ and probably Shadow, and no problem expressing as to why.

The three of them can do something with Apache as a group, then the Baker and I can do something with him, or I’ll get together with him by myself. If the Seer or Shadow have a problem that I don't want to hang with them, for me that will be icing on the cake that the Seer is made aware not everyone is going to cater to her moods and kiss her arse.

Life is just too short to deal with inconsistent people, and this includes family.

Learning Twin 1 was in the area of a new senior building I'd heard was going up, I asked her to do a simple drive-by, get the name of the building so I could check out their website.

Of course, she said she would, but didn't follow through. She never ever EVER follows through where I, her mom, is concerned, but she goes all out, puts herself in danger for the homeless community she serves because she gets noticed. There's accolades from her many followers and press and television.

I'm done with asking her to do anything ever again, but you can bet that, upon my death, she'll milk it for all it's worth with her followers, in press, on television.

Trainer had trouble with his truck this morning and, after stopping by the auto place before this morning’s session, he learned someone had tried to steal his catalytic converter.

The mechanic showed him where things had been cut, but something about the way his converter is situated allowed the thieves to cut what needed to be cut, but unable to remove it.

Trainer was lucky. Hopefully they won’t come back and try again.


  1. JFC! what a world!

    yeah, "Life is just too short to deal with inconsistent people, and this includes family." I have cut many people out; not worth my time or breath. my blog friends are worthy of my attention.

    1. My friends list is pretty much down to me myself and I.

  2. I hope you can get a private visit with Apache , that would be the best. You'll get a real sense of how he is doing.

  3. "the only way my number" Don't you just love people like that? I've ha a few of those also.

    I just saw a news bit on catalytic converters being stolen. They say to have your mechanic etch your cars vin number on it and then paint it yellow.

    1. I don't understand this "spoofing" thing. What do they get out of using someone else's number to call someone else? Etching and yellow ... hmmm. I'll bet thieves can work around that - scratch out the etching, repaint.

  4. Inconsistent People aren't in my Close Ties Inner Circle either. It's how they're hard wired and I don't have the time or patience to deal with a Sometimey wishy-washy personality or those whose Mood Regulation is all over the Map and becomes High Maintenance. It's too exhausting and toxic to me, so I'm selective like you, about boundaries set and not crossed. I can delete people too, without hard feelings on my part, and if on their part they develop hard feelings, well, they have to sort that shit out with a Therapist or something. *winks* Behavior tolerated is behavior accepted. I just can't and won't accept some behaviors so I don't tolerate them, it's as simple as that. I've always said you Teach people how to Treat you... some folks are Unteachable in Learning how to Treat you Right and so they're disposable Relationships to me. If you can't Treat me Right then I Respect myself too much to be Mistreated by anyone for any reason, there's never a good excuse for Bad Behavior. When it's Family it can be tough, but I limit exposure to even Loved Ones who can't be functional enough in the Relationship to have it be a Harmonious mutually beneficial one. Sometimes it's the only way... we're all different in how we Deal with other people and the baggage some Relationships just bring with them. I can overlook a lot of Character Flaws in anyone if they have a good Heart and are Ride Or Die peeps, which are my Tribe of people. The Fair Weather Friends and those with hidden Agendas, I don't have Time for, Life is too Short and the World is full of people so we'll always have all the Relationships to Cultivate that we'll ever Need. Hope Trainer has no more problems with Thieves. Hope Apache is able to get together with you all in ways that work for everyone. I always liked him from what you said about him, I think he's Good People.

  5. "Behavior tolerated is behavior accepted" precisely! Trainer is an old soul, sweet and the very best of people. I felt a kindship with him the minute I met him.