Cut to the Chase, Part 2

I was correct insofar as to why the out-of-the blue, first time call from Middle Grandson. He did indeed need financial assistance.

And guess what …. since I was able to help him, I rather quickly heard from Youngest Grandson. LOL.

How did they even get my telephone number?

At any rate, having provided assistance to Middle and Youngest Grandsons, just to be fair, plus to avoid a third call, I proactively sent Oldest Grandson a substantial, but equal, something something for a clean sweep on the grandsons.

I know times are tough for those out there in the world, while I’ve been blessed with a comfortable retirement, but I’ve hurt myself before — emotionally and financially speaking, doing for others in the family, am fortunate to have recovered at this late stage of life, so I’m not about to fall down that rabbit hole again.

Thinking back on the how and why now, I remembered that Youngest was buying a car last year. His aunt, Twin 2, took him around to dealerships, showed him the ins/outs. She and grandson’s mom pitched in, so grandson could provide a large down payment, get car payments down to manageable, and Twin 2 asked if I’d pitch in.

I did so ... which, I’m now thinking, is what opened the door, got me to the how and why now.

The father of Oldest passed away years ago. Oldest was subsequently raised by his father’s mother when his mom, Twin 1, in her prodigal experience, dropped the ball.

That grandmother's blood pressure problems got the best of her to where, no longer able to care for herself, she is now in the care of relatives in another state.

Middle and Youngest have a dad I have the utmost respect for, and can’t praise enough. He actually took custody of his two boys (Middle and Youngest) and raised them.

So, it really has been a village involved in raising granddaughter and her three brothers. A village that consisted of two grandmothers (me and one other), an aunt (Twin 2) and a very good dad, who can’t do much now because he himself is barely eking out a living.

Yet and still, all the kids love, are loyal to, and put their mom above all of us villagers.

Go figure.

Granddaughter has made a life for herself ─ new marriage, new house, dogs, cat, chickens even, so no worries there ─ even though I think she’s one of those stupid women who live in the moment, blinded by love, who don’t think ahead and prepare ... not believing or accepting or even listening to my, and her mom's warnings, that life can change in an instance.

The boys are struggling, have nothing, and are too attached to their mom — in spite of their unconventional childhood.

Even though Twin 1 has made amends, is doing good, doing right, the way the grandsons are unable to make a decision without consulting her, ask her for financial assistance at times, is somewhat reminding me of my brothers.

They too were overly attached to our mom. Never asked her for money but, instead were mom’s source of income.

Two got married, moved not far away, continued to source mom, and one of the two — the youngest made it far enough away to experience a different kind of life. The other not so much.

The two other brothers (twins) never left home, but worked, turned their paychecks over to mom, and never got to experience any other kind of life.

Seeing the correlation between my brothers (all dead now) and the grandsons, I'm thinking the grandsons need to learn self-sufficiency. Consequently, if any one of them ever asks me for assistance again, I’m going to suggest joining a branch of the military. They’ll have a steady income, see the world, toughen up, become confident, learn to make decisions for themselves, maybe learn a trade or make a career for themselves.

After all, military life can’t be any rougher, or more dangerous for the grandsons than every day living as a Black man in America — walking, driving, sitting, standing, breathing while Black.

Today is a Pain Cave day, after which I was going to drive to the mall, curbside pickup that new coffee maker.

However, it’s looking pretty bleak out there, rain showers are expected, so I’ll hold off until tomorrow.