Déjà Vu

Happy belated Father’s Day to all you dads out there, and single parent moms who are doing double duty ─ parenting as both mom AND dad.

Father’s Day was never big when I was growing up, at least not in our household. Never knew my father, as mom and he separated when I was months old and she relocated out-of-state and that was that until, in my late 20’s, I got tricked into travelling to his funeral. Seeing him in his casket was the first, only and last time I lay eyes on my father.

Mom, a pretty lady, remarried of course ... twice.

Didn’t like my first stepdad ─ father to my sister and brothers and can’t recall a single Father’s Day celebration happening. For sure, if there had been, I’d have not been involved as I’ve never been one to pretend to like who I didn’t.

My second stepdad came into the family when I was grown, on my own, and I liked him. So, I do remember gifting him with tools for Father’s Day until he passed away.

Mom did not remarry after my second stepdad and, having escaped my husband when my girls were only six months old, there was never a Father’s Day celebration with him. So, like I said, Father’s Day was never big in my family.

Elsewhere in my world, I’ve been glued to the news, watching on tv and reading online everything on Bolton and his Book, The Room Where It Happened.

I’ve purchased and read every book that’s come out about No. 45, but I’m done with that and won’t purchase this one, because I don’t want Bolton to prosper as he could have come out with all this information when it mattered ─ during impeachment proceedings. Also, because there’s really nothing new. We all know who 45 is, what he’s done, what he’s likely to do, and none of that knowing has changed anything, so ffs.

When not glued to the news, I’ve been keeping an eye on Nosey’s vacant unit to see if management was going to paint and re-carpet.

They did, but management saved a few bucks by not bringing in professional painters. Instead, Head Maintenance Guy and his assistant did the painting, but management did spring for proper carpet installers.

I’ve not yet seen a cleaning crew, but management may be counting on the maintenance guys to do the cleaning as well, so as to save a few more bucks.

Management is notoriously cheap.

At any rate, we should have a new tenant in the quad soon. Inasmuch as it’s a downstairs unit, the new tenant is not likely to be a handsome active senior.

It occurred to me the other day that I’m the OG in this quad. Not just because I’m the oldest in the quad, but because everyone who lived in the units surrounding me and across from me, when I moved in, has died. Everyone here now came after me.

I’d be spooked about so many deaths around me ─ ghosts and all, except for the fact only one died in her unit. The others were transferred to care facilities, or to live with relatives, and passed away there.

I've noticed seniors tend to give up and let go, rather quickly, when moved away from living independently in their own space.

And, believe it or not, the one who did pass away in her unit ─ Debbie who lived right next door, did visit me a day or so after she passed away. I didn’t see her, thank goodness because I couldn’t handle that, but I could feel her presence and did briefly smell her cigarette scent throughout every room as she passed through here, then moved on to wherever and whomever was next on her visit list.

I’m just back from this morning’s training session, wherein trainer announced he’d no longer be training at that studio after July 31.

Déjà Vu, though actually it’s Precognition.

Remember back in early May when I’d posted about finding myself continuously glancing out the window, looking at the patio, gauging as to whether the space was suitable for working out, because of getting one of those feelings again of knowing something was going to happen before it happens?

I rationalized the feeling I was getting was that Trainer’s studio might not survive, due to Trainer and his partner not being able to hold group sessions upon reopening.

Not having group sessions didn’t impact Trainer at all, as he just switched over to one-on-one personal training, and his partner is independently wealthy, with lots of businesses, so not having group sessions didn't hurt either one of them. However, he and his partner had a disagreement over the weekend, which disagreement Trainer said ended up with his partner disrespecting him in a way he’s not willing to forget or forgive, so he announced to partner that he’s outta there end of next month.

Of course partner realized he’d gone too far, apologized, even called Trainer’s wife and asked her to mediate for him. But Trainer is a lot like me in that there comes a time, and Trainer said there have been other incidents, when we’re done with an individual and there’s no turning back.

I didn’t feel it coming for THIS reason, but I did feel it coming.

At any rate, Trainer is looking for a house with a garage, where he can set up his equipment. If he’s not gotten set up by the end of next month, he says he’ll continue with my training at Planet Fitness.

I’m down with whatever Trainer wants to do, wherever he wants to set up ─ even if we do end up on my tiny balcony.