The Kids Are Alright

That’s how I felt coming away from Thanksgiving with the family. 

Thoughts running through my head, as I left the gathering, headed to the hotel yesterday afternoon, was ... The kids are alright, everyone is in an okay place, I don’t have to worry about any of them any longer, and I can die happy because my work is done. 

Both my girls (Twin 1 and Twin 2) are awake individuals ─ to a degree, granddaughter was born awake, the boys .... not so much, not even a little. From my observation of where they are on the path, I’d be very much surprised if any of the boys wake up to any degree at all in this lifetime. They're nice boys, but their level is judgment, ego and indulging their senses.

My showing up was touch and go right up until the last minute.

Being awaked at 3:00 a.m. by a heavy rain, I was pretty much ready to cancel the trip and pay the $191.54 hotel penalty but, going back and forth in a conversation with myself, it was decided that if the rain ceased by 11:00, which was the time I planned to leave, then the trip was back on. I then went back to sleep, awakened again just before 7:00 to find it was wet and still sprinkling outside, but I felt it’d be okay to take my chances and brave the freeway ... still reluctant, figuring there’d be some accidents because of the way folks drive when there’s been a rain.

THEN, I got a text from Twin 2 that changed my whole outlook.

“On this Thanksgiving day you are one of the things that I am most grateful for. Thank you for taking a special interest in developing our skills and talents when we were kids. Thank you for making it happen every Christmas. Those are my best childhood memories. Thank you for making sure we ate every day. Thank you for sacrificing yourself to make sure that we were taken care of. For putting up with crap at work to keep a roof over our head. Thank you for teaching me to crochet and sew. Thank you for being an example of generosity and giving. I know that my heart for others came from you.

Thank you for being an example of good health and good karma to us as adults. I love you so much. Happy Thanksgiving!

The older I get. The more I see how hard single parenting of two girls must have been. I don't know how you did it. You maintained a social life, went to school, and didn't just raise us, you parented us. I recognize that you knew I was into Holly Hobby and Shirley (Shirley Jr./Twin 1) Henrietta Hippo. That you saw my ability for creativity and got me paint by number, loom knitting, crochet stuff. I remember clearly going to Woolworths with you to get yarn. You talked to us and shared your childhood with us. Your pain as an adult. That's what makes Shirley and I the people that we are today. We're smart because of you. We're pretty because of you. We're ladies because of you. Every fingernail you painted for us was not wasted.”

I burst into tears, but the tears washed away my reluctance. I felt reenergized and appreciated, for the first time ever.

She (Twin 2) got it.

She got me.

By the time I was all packed up and ready to leave at 11:00, the sun was up, outside was dry and the drive was easy breezy ─ practically felt like I had the whole freeway to myself.

Once again, I was surrounded by food I cannot eat ... turkey, candied yams, collard greens, mac and cheese, dressing, gravy, dinner rolls, potato salad, cranberry sauce, peach cobbler, ice cream, pies on top of pies. And once again, I wasn’t even tempted, having brought my own safe meals. (Mage, I guess you missed my former reply to your inquiry that I have an allergic reaction to basic components of most products used in day-to-day cooking ─ mostly wheat, soy, corn. Safer for me to eat only what I myself cook to avoid what I call a gut episode (known as gastroparesis) that lasts for weeks.)

At any rate, I once again was not even tempted. Food has become less and less important to me. For one food is too costly nowadays -- If I didn't have to buy groceries, I'd be a millionaire. For two, my having to eat safe has evolved me from a person who previously lived to eat (and therefore having to constantly diet to keep my weight down) to a person who eats to live and no longer has to worry about weight gain. Groceries are still expensive though. Even more so, because I have to purchase quality ingredients.

There were, however mimosas. 

I passed on the orange juice (too much acid), but having learned champagne goes down easy, I happily indulged ... a few times.

Even asked for champagne to go. Took it in a tumbler to the hotel and enjoyed getting a little sloshed while all bundled up warm and cozy in my onesie pajamas.

So, I came, I saw, I had a good time, got to meet a surprise addition to the family – granddaughter’s boyfriend. Her first serious relationship.

Of course, I had to give him a gentle third-degree. He seems sweet, has a job working in a hospital ─ something to do with EKGs, has his own place, comes from a family of Mormons, though he does not consider himself Mormon, is five years older than granddaughter, and has introduced granddaughter to his family. Now he’s met hers, so we’ll see what's up with this. He passed everyone's approval though.

Today, day after Thanksgiving, is the day I generally hold to tradition and begin with the Christmas decorations.

Not feeling it today. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe the day after tomorrow.