Stream of Consciousness

My sabbatical from the outside world ─ three whole days inside, Friday through Sunday, no training, no off-premises errands, nothing to do, nowhere to go until Monday, is flying by way too fast.

It’s Saturday and my head is torturing me with chanting “Monday is coming”. Which is something it used to do on weekends when I had to go to work the upcoming Monday.

Retired now, having to get dressed, leave the unit for to-do’s and training is beginning to feel like a job that begins on Monday, ends on Friday. Consequently, I'm dreading Mondays again.

At any rate, I had a list of inside purging projects I’d planned to take care of, but never got around to because I spent Christmas Day sitting on the couch, online shopping, needlepointing and watching Christmas movies.

Not the sickly-sweet ones that I can’t stomach. My watch list is more along the lines of the naughty and macabre.

That being Bad Santa 1 and 2, which is a sick movie I find so hilariously funny that, though I’ve viewed countless times before, I still laugh and am appalled at some of the scenes as though it’s all brand new and, thus far, I watched Billy Bob Thornton in one of his more disgusting portrayals, twice more as the station ran it back-to-back.

Then there were a few Homicide for the Holidays real-life crime dramas, showing family on family, friends on friends, and good deeds ending badly crimes.

Some heavy-duty stuff there, but I balanced it out by watching Love Actually, where Walking Dead Rick was shown clean shaven and English handsome.

Just look at that smooth face of his. Talk about something being pretty perfect.

I can’t imagine it’s still that way after working in the hot Georgia sun, filming Walking Dead.

Also, I further balanced out the naughty and macabre with Home Alone 1 and Alone 2 (Lost in New York).

I don’t know if Apache’s six-feet apart get together took off, as I didn’t go outside to check.

Thankfully, the power company removed us from the PSPS list, so I was able to make tamales after all. However, not trusting it, I dumbed the recipe down to where I only made six ─ nothing in the freezer for a handy meal, but that six was enough for lunch, dinner with a small salad, and breakfast with an egg this morning.

Actually, the process of making tamales for a single individual was easy breezy compared to making dozens.

I didn’t even measure, just tossed masa flour in the mixer, added water until the consistency felt right, let it rest while the corn husks soaked and, after spreading and tossing in a little left-over chicken and onion-free garlic-free taco sauce, steamed ‘em and voilá.

Easy breezy and, unlike the folks I saw on ABC’s newsfeed, risking infection by standing in line for three-hours to purchase pre-made masa, this single serving method will be my preferred tamale-making process henceforth.

After years of practice in swallowing and pushing down, I was also able to swallow, push down and rise above the hurt I was feeling for Anjanette Young being so cruelly handled by the Chicago PD and the city’s attorneys.

I guess it's a little like the steps involved in the loss/grief process.

That last post, I was in the depression stage. Now, I don't like it, I'll never like incidents such as that, but I'm at the acceptance stage. It is what it is but, insofar as the "hope" stage, my only hope is that she gets a settlement that will bankrupt the city, put a hurt on the police department's budget and the individual cops involved.

This morning, watching news about No. 45 on the golf course, while the moratorium on evictions is coming to an end, unemployment benefits are ending, and no aid from the government in sight, I can’t but wonder how many who voted him into office are feeling now, as some of them must be amongst the citizenry being impacted — even some of those proud boys. And if not them, personally, their family members must be struggling, suffering as a result of what their idol is doing and failing to do.

Do those idiots now, in hindsight, see how they’ve been scammed?

Do they now understand that instead of draining the swamp, he brought the swamp with him?

Are they now realizing he doesn’t care about them, only about what benefits him?

And speaking of realizing ... now that I’m aware Biden is against the death penalty, and may well abolish it altogether, I’m not entirely happy that I voted for him. But, with the only other option being four more years of No. 45, I'll just have to live with it and work myself through the anger process if No. 46 does follow through and abolishes the death penalty.

My last stream of consciousness is about that Nashville Bombing. The news indicated evacuate orders were coming from that RV and from responding police officers. One guy was walking his dog and, when told by an officer to get off the streets/evacuate, his response was “Why? Why should I evacuate”.

Fortunately, he survived because the cop pushed him inside a building just as the explosion went off, but what a complete arse to question why.

You wouldn’t have had to tell me twice.

Act first, question later.