Yesterday was chaotic.
Along around 10:15, Painted Rock Lady telephoned, asked "Are we meeting this morning?" (to discuss the flyers she wants).
I said, "Thursday at 11:00".
"Today is Thursday, and I’m already down here waiting for you".
"Oh crap!", said I. "Let me throw on some clothes and I’ll be right down".
It’s not unusual for me to get my days mixed up, so I accepted yesterday was Thursday and I’d somehow missed a day … Wednesday.
Arriving at the Community Room she was looking at her phone. Said, "I just checked the date and today IS Wednesday, not Thursday".
So not only did she call me down on the wrong day, it was also the wrong time; but whatever. I was there, so we worked out designs for her flyers.
While the two of us were in the room, Crafty Lady (having a momentary retrieve from her heart issues) and some of the Usual Suspects set up a table to work on Rain Sticks, which turns out to be closing off the end of a paper towel tube, inserting rice, closing off the other end of the tube, embellishing the tube and Voilà … rain sticks.
I didn’t make one, just stuck around to take photos for the seniors’ Facebook page, listen to the latest tea, which was that the last two Usual Suspects who moved away are now sorry.
Both moved to be closer to family. One is installed in a box style senior building — rows of rooms, hotel corridor set up, everyone in their own little space, walls paper thin, not the open areas to roam around like here, all of which she says is making it difficult to make friends, not to mention she’s not getting the care and closeness with family she’d expected.
The other moved out of state to be with family, and now says it was a mistake to leave the community, that she can’t get along with her daughter.
I’ve seen that happen a lot over the years I’ve lived here. Some former residents move back, others try but, for one reason or another, management won’t allow them back.
Red Light comes to mind. She was immediately regretful of moving, kept coming back to visit/involve herself in our activities, until she was told "You're no longer a resident. Not allowed to participate".
Whereupon she had a hissy fit. Made harassing telephone calls, sent harassing text messages.
I was worried she'd apply for a unit and return but, due to the harassment, she's blown any chance of returning.
Though the community and management would welcome the other two back with open arms, I doubt I’ll see either of the other two return, even if they wanted to. One is not healthy enough to handle another move, the other is in Texas; the logistics of moving back to California would be too difficult.
No way will my former Next Door Neighbor regret moving. She never liked it here and is now in a community that meets the bougie vibe she craved.
I sat with the ladies in the Community Room until their crafts were completed and they tried out their rain sticks.
Kinda reminds me of the Shake Weights that Suzanne Somers was hawking back in the day, LOL.
At any rate, the rain sticks fortunately did not work. Today, April 30th, is a sunny 81°.
Tomorrow ….
I know some people who relocated to be closer to kids, but then the kids had a job change and moved, leaving the parents high and dry.
ReplyDeleteOh Wow!
DeleteMoving when we are older is fraught with issues. We left Boston in 2018 to retire to Arizona. We left family behind for our "retirement adventure". It was fun at first. We were still in our sixties with lots of energy. The biggest problem for us was we were so far away from family. And no-one ever came to visit us out there. It is a long trip and expensive. When Covid hit we decided to move back and we are so glad we did. We are near the family again (about an hour away). But we are also back in our old neighborhood so luckily we have all our doctors and dentists back. I always tell people now to be careful moving after a certain age. When we are young and move we take our kids with us. So no problem. When they are older with their own lives it is a different story.
ReplyDeleteWhoever coined the phrase "You can never go home again/never return to a previous state of life" didn't know you, because you managed to do so and are now cautioning others 👍 🙂.
DeletePerhaps the kids ought to relocate to be closer to their parents??? Or at least take the time to visit their parent or parents. When you wait to do something you often miss the chance.
ReplyDeleteThat's a thought ... instead of luring elderly parents away to live closer, the children should do the moving and yep, when you snooze you lose.
DeleteNow THAT is a great craft idea! I love rain sticks and had a couple of them for my drumming circles back in the day. Shaking them vigorously like that does not produce the soothing rain sound, though. The stick needs to be held at an angle and slowly, slowly, turned end to end for that sound effect to occur.
ReplyDeleteOops! on creating a soothing rain sound. Probably, why the sticks didn't work .... it's fortunately still sunny and warm outside. Not to mention, the ladies had a few missteps while putting it together. There was rice EVERYWHERE. I had to go upstairs, bring the Dyson down to clean up.
DeleteOh dear, LOL! But it WAS raining -- RAINING RICE!
Delete👍 🙂
DeleteI'm a big believer in NOT moving to where your kids are. They have their own life, and it can change and take them elsewhere. Also, at our ages, medical care and convenience to shopping, etc, is a huge part of the location. And, how easily do they make friends...never go somewhere expecting others to be your go-between for making friends.
ReplyDeleteI agree. When Twin 2 and I ended up living in buildings next to each other, it was not by design. I wasn't looking to depend on her for anything, she wasn't looking to be responsible for me, it was just how things worked out. And while living there, she had her life, I had my own.
DeleteI just signed a lease renewal for 18 months, which I thought was a strange length (6, 12, or 18) but I took it to keep the rent going up for that long. I have quiet neighbors and enough courtyard to walk. I discussed with both my kids and they liked me being here, close enough to both of them but not on their doorstep.
ReplyDeleteI'd definitely sign up for 18 months to keep the rent stable. They only do 12 here and, knock on wood, the increases haven't been too terrible awful. Close but not on their doorstep worked for me and Twin 2, now she's an hour or so away. Still works though.
DeleteGeography does not solve problems. You take your own sack of problems with you wherever you go.
ReplyDeleteKeep up with the rain sticks. The Sierra snowpack melted early this year and drought conditions are forthcoming.
Will Jay
"Wherever you go, there you are" is how I've heard that expressed and it is soooo true. Sounds like you might need to grab an empty tube and make your own personal rain stick 🙂.
DeletePlease put in your newsletter that rain sticks are to be gently turned and inverted slowly to sound soothing. Shakin' 'ems gonna make hail! Maybe they just want maracas. = (Put paper mache' around a light bulb; let it dry, thump the bulb hard, breaking the glass inside, and you have a maraca. My Golden retriever found it, liked the flour glue paste and partly ate one! The vet said she'd probably be ok. Lived a long life.) Linda in Kansas
ReplyDeleteHail might be fun. I've not seen hail since I was a kid.
DeleteHappy May 1st. The rain sticks were cute.
ReplyDeleteThe ladies had fun with them.
DeleteI know a woman who said, "I didn't like living in dorms in college, and certainly don't want that when I'm older", thinking of your comment about people living in little rooms along the hallway.
ReplyDeleteWe've had a dry dry winter here as well. I'd be willing to give rain sticks a try.
LOL, on the rain sticks. If you don't try, you'll never know. I hope to never have to experience living in one of those little rooms.
Delete