Bad for My Image

Having long enjoyed being considered the "Hot Girl" amongst us old folks, the new jewelry Twin 1 ordered is putting my image in serious jeopardy.

After looking into Will Jay’s suggestions to "design some jewelry or fiber art to hide/disguise the Life Alert device" and thus far drawing a blank, I thought maybe I’d just tuck it in.

But then Will Jay’s story about a friend’s mom setting off an accidental alert by tucking the device in her waistband got me to thinking how easily it would be for the device to get squeezed into an alert tucked in such a snug place, not to mention it sometimes gets hot in there and that alone might set off a false alarm.

Maybe I can just shorten the rope, turn the device into a choker, thought I.

Nope! That makes the device even more obvious.

I looked into exchanging the pendant for a bracelet or watch, but Life Alert only offers the option of a necklace pendant with its systems.

So, I dunno but, heading for the market today, I decided to give tucking a try.

Crossing the parking lot, I ran into Next Door Neighbor. The device, tucked inside, she never even noticed there was something attached to the rope as we chatted for a while about what a great job my boyfriend in my head Dark Gavin is doing ("Dark" because, taking a step from blog friend Dawn who, when pushed transforms into Dark Dawn, and now seeing my boyfriend transforming into a version of The Punisher, I've rewarded him with the superhero name of Dark Gavin).

I did have to be careful in placement of the car’s seat belt, because the normal position was right across the device, sure to put pressure on the button, set it off.

I had to position the belt above the device, across my throat.

I can't get a ticket for the awkward, probably unsafe, position as the law only says to wear it, and it's being worn.

While in the market, I did some bending, stooping, reaching. None of these motions seemed likely to result in an accidental alert. So, thus far, it seems tucking is the way to go.

One of the items on my marketing list was kale. I eat a lot of kale, I mean a lot, a lot and saw it today was selling $3 for two bunches, but who do they think they’re kidding.

Kale aficionado that I am, I noticed right away the price is not a bargain, that what used to be one healthy bunch at $2.50 is now selling as two slimmer bunches, i.e., the two smaller bunches at $3.00 is the same amount of kale in one bunch previously sold for $2.50, but disguised as 2 for $3.00 — $0.50 cents more.

No matter. I'll buy kale however bountiful or not the bunch, whatever price.

Not on my grocery list were these Aloha bell peppers, but they called my name. So wanting to see if they taste any different than regular bells, and because they’re pretty, I purchased two.

BTW, under the title of Work Smarter Not Harder, did you know you can dispense with hand massaging, and instead use the mixer to massage your kale.