Knock Knock Knock

As if I don’t have enough on my plate, I walked into the bedroom yesterday afternoon to switch outfits after having run errands and …………… so much on my plate that I’ve been incorrectly referring to Twin 2 as the daughter who is estranged from her adult children.

Twin 2 has no children — she devoted her energies to helping me step in for her twin’s kids when their mom (Twin 1) was in her prodigal experience ……………… not financially and/or emotional there for the kids.

It's Twin 1 whose heart is breaking at not being able to turn back time, make amends for bad parenting choices.

She’s given the moniker Twin 1 because she came out of the womb first, five minutes ahead of her sister, Twin 2.

I’ve made what corrections I could find to recent posts misidentifying which twin is which, but no surprise I misidentified the twins as I’ve been walking around like a zombie last few days with the family’s dramarama clogging my brain (thanks for that word Karen), but as I was saying ……………… I walked into the bedroom yesterday afternoon to switch outfits after having run errands when, through the bedroom window I spied the Talker’s disabled brother sitting on the bench outside, along with two fit looking guys.

Oh! Oh!, thought I. That looks like my Little Stalker’s uncles and if they’re here on the premises, then she is as well.

Sure enough, there was a knock knock knock on the door shortly after.

Little Stalker said she’d not been around because of school, but that she’ll be visiting me again soon with another bear to babysit.

No way José, I said to myself. Another bear would be her manipulating me into creating another book — like the one I made back in 2023 when she dumped a bear on me.

I told her I can’t handle babysitting duties right now that, if she left another bear, I’d have to charge her for babysitting, and I hurried her away with a bag of See’s chocolate eggs.

My last visit to See’s, just before Easter, the clerk had tossed a handful of those eggs in my bag. Knowing eventually Little Stalker would resurface, I’d saved them in the freezer for her.

Little Stalker’s grandma has an upstairs unit; consequently, is one of the few residents who can climb stairs, get to my unit, so she was standing there with Little Stalker when I begged off babysitting another bear.

Hopefully, grandma understood the message and will hold Little Stalker back from burdening me with another.

Earlier that morning, I ran out of a needlepoint floss color and had to make a run to the craft store.

Checking out, the cashier asked, "Would you be interested in signing up for a credit card?"

"No thanks".

"You can save x number of dollars on today’s purchase".

"No thanks".

Then she tried to interest me in a Rewards program and some other something.

"No thanks, No thanks, No thanks".

I know she was only doing what her supervisor asked her to do ………… push these things onto customers, but how many times can one say "No thanks" before going off?

Fortunately, I maintained, was polite and firm with my no's, even though she was making a pest of herself and made me forget to use my coupons.

Since I was in the area of the Tire Place, I popped in to get the tire pressure checked, where the kid on the air station also tried to play me the fool.

I’m sure he’d too had been told to do so by his supervisors …………… If a woman comes in, take advantage of her, turn the free air service into her paying for other services, because he told me I needed to replace the back wiper blade ($20) and have the lug nuts replaced ($80).

Bullcrap, thought I.

I’d just last week taken the car into the dealership for its annual multi-point inspection, and the invoice made no mention of needing a back wiper blade and lug nuts replaced.

So, either the kid at the tire place is fibbing or the dealership is fibbing, or both are lying.

I purchased the Jeep in 2018, have logged in only 15,500 miles. So with so little driving, and definitely not overusing the wiper blades because I don’t drive in the rain, I seriously doubt the blades or lug nuts need changing out; consequently, the tire place is jerking my chain.

On the other hand, because the Jeep came with the last Lifetime Warranty Jeep offered on parts and labor, it is within the realms of possibility the dealership doesn’t want to bother with services for which they will not be able to charge me, so made no mention of either.

Can’t trust anybody anywhere these days, so I googled and learned "Depending on the type of vehicle it is and the age, the lug nuts may need to be replaced anywhere between five and 15 years; As a good rule of thumb, a vehicle's wiper blades will last six to 9 months".

I might pop into the dealership, get the blades changed, but I’m not worried about the lug nuts and wish folks would realize I may be of the elder generation, but that doesn’t mean I’m gullible, and they can run any old game on me.

Meanwhile

Life goes on around the complex, and elsewhere in the world, as I kept thinking thinking thinking of the best way to approach the monkey wrench thrown into next month’s visit to Long Beach or ways around it.

What I've decided is to skip Day 1 of the Festival altogether, so I can enjoy alone time with the babies before the Party. Tell Twin 1 Saturday's a bust because of the Party, that I can stop by her place, spend time with her on Friday, before I check into the hotel, then early breakfast on Sunday, watch the Parade, go together to Day 2 of the Festival.

When that solution popped into my head, the thinking thinking thinking stopped.

Heading out for yesterday morning’s workout, I noticed TinTin had finally removed the dresser drawer from her patio.

How did I miss that?

I was here, inside, all weekend, heard nothing that sounded like furniture being moved.

I checked the dumpster on my way to the car, didn’t see it, so what did she do with it?

Did she move it inside?

What finally prompted her to remove it was probably management getting into trouble with the Inspectors when they (the Inspectors) were on the premises last Thursday doing whatever it is they do.

I didn’t stick around for the Inspection. I used that day to get the Jeep serviced. So, no idea if my unit was inspected.

Returning from the Cave yesterday morning, I ran into the Talker who tells me Not Dead Nancy’s unit was inspected.

Inasmuch as Nancy has been in the hospital for over two months, and her estranged daughters (another dysfunctional family situation) have been going in taking things …… according to Nancy’s next-door neighbor, no telling what the Inspectors found inside that somewhat abandoned unit.

Other than that, I’ve no idea which units were inspected. Only that TinTin moved the dresser from the patio …… after-the-fact, which indicates she probably received a long overdue Lease Violation.

News coming out of the Hush Trial is that Mr. Docket No. 71543 fell asleep during jury selection yesterday.

Social media comments, as was expected, have been brutal ………

Last week's kitchen adventure was Fried Boiled Eggs. I tried various recipes, different spices, had Fried Boiled Eggs for breakfast, lunch, dinner before I moved on.

This week's kitchen adventure is Cabbage Soup, ala Mistress Maddie's recipe.

It was delish and filling with old-fashioned Hot Water Cornbread on the side.

Thanks for the recipe Mistress.

Oy Vey!!!!

So my life just became more complicated.

Long Beach Pride Festival begins Saturday, May 18, 11 am, continues through Sunday, after the Parade.

I’ve got my hotel booked and a lineup of cool t-shirts to wear.

A few weeks back, Twin 1 indicated she wanted to spend time with me, would arrange her schedule to stop by here ……… the senior complex; but when I told her I’d be in Long Beach for Pride, she said she’d join me in that adventure instead.

"Cool" said I, but now my cup runneth over because I’ve recently been invited to attend the Great Grandson’s 2nd Birthday Party, Saturday, May 18, 2 pm ……… same day as Pride, right smack dab in the middle of the time I’d planned to be on the Marina Green, attending the festival with Twin 1.

One would think that ordinarily this would not be a problem. The easy solution is for the two of us to leave the Festival just before 2 o’clock, head for the Birthday Party, return to the Festival after, but one would be wrong because one doesn’t understand the dynamics of my seriously dysfunctional family.

Twin 1 (the baby’s Glam-ma) was totally self-involved during the years she was to have parented her children, resulting in her now no longer having a relationship with any of her five adult children.

A few years ago, she reached the level of enlightenment where she realized how she emotionally hurt and damaged her children, whereupon there was apologizing, followed by spurts of forgiveness and reconciliation, but sometimes the trauma one has caused in the life of others goes so deep that it can’t be undone.

The clock ultimately could not be unwound — forgiveness and reconciliation did not last.

As things stand now, Twin 1’s children are going on with living their lives not wanting her in it. Carrying a boatload of guilt, not able to forgive her own self, Twin 1 has turned to clearing her conscious by doing for the homeless community (her street children) what she failed to do for her own.

As for me, I’ve been put through the ringer by nearly every damn family member there was and is. However, understanding that everything in life (good and bad) happens for a reason, I’ve managed to not internalize what I’ve experienced. I harbor no ill will, let everyone live their own lives the way they feel fit, respect how they choose to interact or not interact with each other, touch base now and then, but remain careful to protect myself, maintain an emotional distance, not get too attached.

So, I’m definitely going to the baby’s birthday party but I’m trying to figure out how I can leave Twin 1 at the Festival, head to the party without it being a hurtful reminder that she’s not allowed to see the grandbabies ………… Is not invited.

She’s frequently in tears as it is thinking about how she screwed up, can't undo and can’t be forgiven. She wouldn’t expect me not to go, and I wouldn’t not go anyway, but I’m fearing how her knowing there is even a party and she not being allowed to go is going to twist the knife in even more than it already is.

I’m thinking, I should probably just let her know now, in advance, this would be happening, so she has time to process, cry it out, has the option to bow out of spending time with me altogether if she can’t handle my leaving her alone at the Festival, or give her time to make arrangements for a third or fourth person to attend the festival with us so she’ll be supported through the hurt and can continue having fun once I take off for the party.

Oy Vey!!!! The whole situation makes my heart hurt, and is sending me to that See's candy I have stored in the fridge.

All in all, it's a tragic reminder of how we create our own reality or, like I've often put it, "You make your choices, you live with the choices you make".

BTW, White Grandma will also not be in attendance. In fact, she’s been so toxic, done so much backbiting, created so much stress and drama for the kids, that she’s earned herself an actual uninvite ……………… been specifically told it's the end of the line "We do not want you there".

However, it wouldn’t surprise me to see White Grandma waltz her arse in just the same.

In other news, barring any last minute scrambling, tomorrow is jury selection for No. 45’s hush money criminal trial.

Shame it’s not being televised. If it were, I’d not be working out tomorrow. I’d be glued to the tube just like I was during O.J.’s trial.

On the other hand, I’m not feeling good about this trial, not hopeful that it will finally lead to our being rid of him once and for all, but I will wear my lock him up t-shirt tomorrow for luck.

What a Week!

I’m beginning to think Catalyst’s comment on my last post "Eclipse, Schmeclipse, who cares anyway. It only means the Apocalypse is getting close" is right on, because so much has happened in the world this week.

Last weekend’s rain ………… third weekend in a row we had rain to deal with, plus rain expected this weekend, not to mention the up and down weather during the week of freezing cold one day, 90 degree heat the next, had me not feeling my best as I fought off an ear infection and sore throat.

Along with the up and down weather, there was the Eclipse, sentencing of the Goon Squad Cops that tortured two Black men in Mississippi, news that Paul Flores (purported unaliver of Kirsten Smart) had been knifed in prison for the second time and, lastly, ta ta so long to O.J. Simpson.

That was a lot for one week.

If you’re unfamiliar with the Goon Squad, it consists of six white Mississippi cops (Brett Morris McAlpin, 53; Christian Dedmon, 29; Jeffrey Middleton, 46; Hunter Elward, 31; and Daniel Opdyke, 28 and a former police officer from the city of Richland, Joshua Hartfield, 32).

A white neighbor took exception with mixing of races and reported seeing two Black men (Michael Corey Jenkins and Eddie Terrell Parker) living with a white woman.

Not illegal in this year of 2024 but hey, it’s Mississippi.

At any rate, the cops illegally entered the home, kicked, waterboarded, shouted racial slurs, assaulted Jenkins and Parker with stun guns and a sex toy, then Elward shot Jenkins in the mouth.

Their vicious acts were then covered up by planting drugs and having Jenkins and Parker arrested.

With McAlpin and Middleton threatening to kill the other officers if they spoke up, those false charges stood for months until pressure mounting from a Justice Department civil rights probe caused one of the six to break rank and spill the beans.

This week was the Day of Reconning for the six.

Jeffrey Middleton 46, Daniel Opdyke 28, Hunter Elward 31,
Brett McAlpin 53, Christian Dedmon 29, Joshua Hartfield 32

I’d have liked to have seen the neighbor that set this whole thing in motion charged for something ……… anything, but what I don’t get is why can’t people with this kind of bias hatred just stop?

You want to hurt someone because you don't like the color of their skin, you don't like them mixing with other races, you don't want them in your neighbor, you hate for whatever reason, and you act out on that hate. People are harmed, people are unalived but, inasmuch as 9 out of 10 times you are caught, called out, imprisoned, your own reputation gone, life in tatters, so what purpose did it serve to act out on your hatred?

It just boggles my mind that folks can’t live their own lives, leave others alone.

Also of note this week was the Eclipse (Partial in my neck of the woods).

After reading reports of those who experienced the Total, I’m jealous and wishing I were more the adventurous type as I could travel to Spain to view the projected 2027 Total.

In the meantime …..

My Kinda Eclipse with Guacamole

As for Paul Flores, second time in a row he's been knifed while under protective care, so I don’t think he’s going to survive much longer in prison. He should probably just tell what he did with Kirsten’s body.

Speaking of telling, the least noteworthy event this week, on my scale, was the passing of O.J. Simpson without clearing his conscious and confessing.

No surprise though that he was a liar to the end as he’d lied at reports of his health not being well, saying his health was good just before that was proved a lie by his demise.

He always reminded me of my abusive egomaniac ex. He too could never accept responsibility for his actions.

In fact, when the ex learned he had six-months to live, something in him, possibly conscious, prompted him to call, give me the news.

As if I cared.

But my humanity took over and I offered forgiveness, saying "I hold no ill will for anything".

His reply was to get pompous, arrogant, "I? I did nothing."

Okay, I thought to myself, You tell that to St. Peter at the gate that torturing, abusing women was nothing. Then, after he passed away, I guess reality hit because there were visitations ... many visitations with he begging for forgiveness.

By then, my heart had hardened. All I could think of was his saying "I? I did nothing", so I told him forgiveness had been offered, he'd gotten his usual arrogant self, now it was too late, so F off and go straight to hell. (Yes, I spoke to a dead person).

After a time he did. I'm assuming both the F'ing off and going to Haydes.

One interesting thing I ran across in reading comments about O.J. was that thousands of Ford Broncos (the car made famous by the 1994 slow speed police chase) were recalled the same day he passed away.

Though the recall had nothing to do with his death, but involved possible cracked fuel injectors that could cause a fire, comments were "They both ran out of gas".

Odd that the recall happened the day he passed away and, inasmuch as I don't believe in coincidences your guess as to its cosmic meaning is as good as mine.

Recap

I was so expecting a total eclipse (didn't learn until after the fact we were not in the path of a total) that I was tempted to call off yesterday morning’s workout, because I didn't want to be in the back of the studio, away from the windows, miss the eclipse.

Instead, I suited up and headed to the Cave with a plan.

The plan was to annoy Trainer by letting him know I'd be going rogue that morning ......  instead of following his routine of having me keep the heartrate up on the treadmill between sets, I’d instead run outside, check progress of the eclipse, run back in.

Arriving at the Pain Cave, I could see (with the protective glasses of course) that the eclipse was already at a partial stage. There was some mild protestations upon informing Trainer of my plan, with his doubting the importance of viewing the Eclipse until I guilted him by saying, "It’s a phenomenon. I won’t be around for the next one".

He got onboard after that, changed the routine to no strength training, just 15 minutes on the treadmill, then we went outside and had a watch party with the owner of the liquor store next door.

Seeing no progress beyond the partial by end of my session, I returned to the complex, again checked for movement towards a total eclipse, but noooo, still partial, and then a car pulled up.

Of course, it was Meat Man, stopping to say hey and ask about my take on the eclipse, as he was heading out of the complex.

Before driving away, he did the usual pursing of his lips, made kissing sounds, and waved the kisses towards me.

That used to amuse me. This time I actually shuddered.

Meat Man would never harm me or anyone. I don’t think he’s that guy. However, now knowing how sleazy he is, the gesture made my skin crawl.

This morning was the 15-minute and now once-a-month Walking Club.

Homegirl happened to be out walking, so I invited her to join Activity Director and I.

The pace was fast. I logged in 1,500 steps, 1.17 miles in the allotted 15 minutes.

Mouths were running as fast as the pace ... which is why I prefer walking alone, no talking, listening to music.

However, some interesting tea was spilled. Like, though I've seen Red Light preparing for the move ... bagging up, tossing out, in actuality Red Light won't be moving for another two months.

She has been approved for the new apartment, but paperwork is involved in getting her transferred from one County's program to another, and bureaucracies are slow moving.

Eyes on the Sky